Over the last one week, while chatting with different people, I heard a lot about incidents of not so cordial relationship between mother-in-law and daughter- in-law, two colleagues, employer-employee, teacher-student, two friends and so on.. That made me think what clicks a relationship and this is my reflection.
“Acceptance (of the other person) is a two way process”. By this, I mean, unless both involved are not willing to engage and accept each other, relationship can’t blossom.
So what are the enablers of any long term and mutually nurturing relationships?
- Compassion and non-judgement
- Respect for what the person is irrespective of her/his appearance, cultural background, difference in language or lack of articulation, education, etc etc.
- Flexibility in own ways of thinking, responding, behaving.
- Love. I know it can’t be unconditional and without expectations all the time or in all the relationships, but simple love for the other. Not too much to ask for, right?
- Time together: to break the ice and melt it too. I believe most of the dysfunctional relationships are because of lack of investment in time together. And it’s not enough to spend time in the beginning, but at every stage, to nurture the relationship. Both persons involved need not become buddies sticking to each other all the time, but assuring that ‘I have time for you any time’ is what it needs.
- And lastly, maturity to accept differences and still have respect and love. I think, that’s the crux of it.
Find your own relationship enablers. Enable the other to be empowered yourself. Ultimately life is more about relationships that we build than the assets we posses.
Any views? Please do share.